Being the "mom" at the cafe' and teaching self respect

I am older, I admit it.  I am 43 years old.  The majority of the girls I work with are my daughter's age, from 17 upwards to about 22.  So naturally I have motherly feelings toward them and treat them like my children.  "Wait honey, don't lift that its too heavy - let me help you."  "Why don't you take the cart so you can make 1 trip instead of 3?"  "Hold on, you need to let the boss know that you can't work on Sunday like you told him last week.  Don't be taken advantage of you need the day off and you requested it."  and the ever popular "Take a break honey, you need to eat."

This chatter happens every day that I work, and the girls - I think - for the most part, enjoy being "coddled".  After all, who couldn't mother a rosy-cheeked, wide eyed young lady on the path to adulthood? 

I'd like to think that I have made a small contribution to these girls by instilling a sense of responsibility and most of all, self worth by teaching them to speak up appropriately and not get walked on.  Many older adults can be condescending, especially to teenagers.  That is exactly the wrong message to send, how can young adults learn to respect their elders if we don't show them respect in kind?

I've always thought that every person should waiter/waitress for at least 6 months during their life.  Nothing teaches humility and the ability to put up with people's idiosyncrasies better than having to serve them a meal; nor does it take a self-centered, immature person long to realize they are not the center of the universe.  I waitressed and was an assistant manager at a Friendly's restaurant during my senior year in high school and during college as well.  I have an instant reaction to people who are not kind to their waiter/waitress or other people who help them such as a cashier; disgust and annoyance.  I am disappointed in their lack of manners and common sense.  Remember no matter what you do someone will be waiting on you and you will be waiting on someone.  Always treat people with respect, the way you expect to be treated.

Regardless of what type of work these girls end up doing, I hope they stand up for themselves and portray themselves as responsible, intelligent adults who are capable of handling anything that comes their way.

Juggling a job search, a part-time job, household chores and staying sane

I have never learned how to juggle but it sure looks like fun.  What is not fun and I have learned to juggle is - and am still practicing - is juggling my job search, my part-time job, and cooking and cleaning and maintaining the household.  Am I sane?  Well that depends on when you ask.

When my house is clean, I cooked a nice meal for the family, sent out a few resumes to promising job openings and finished a day of work at the cafe I feel like I've got a good handle on things.  When one of these tasks is out of whack, well then, duck and cover.

My house isn't terribly large but having 2 floors and lugging cleaning supplies and the vacuum cleaner up the stairs, it seems so...daunting.  And having a furry grey cat prone to shedding and a rambunctious 9 month old puppy who occasionally still has accidents, its a recipe for disaster.  Grey fur tumbleweeds can build quickly, even after 2 days so it seems the house constantly needs vacuuming.  And finding a "gift" from the dog in a random place is always a surprise.

Ooh, I forgot all about the laundry!

Entering a new world - the world of working as an independent consultant

Finally things seem to be turning a bit my way - I see some dim light at the end of the tunnel and it doesn't look like a high speed train.  I accepted my first independent consulting job for a company, working approximately 20 hours per week on a potential 3 month contract.  Please pardon my excitement for a moment...WOOHOO!!

I've never worked on a contract basis, so naturally I am a bit nervous.  But a few hours at the computer researching the independent consultant worker and its description and needed paper work, I am much more confident.  I had my first meeting last Friday, and put on some dress work clothes and high heels - the first heels I've worn in quite a while!  My meeting went well and my contract has officially begun. 

For those of my readers who are also independent consultants, I found an excellent website resource. 

One of the key things to remember as an independent consultant is the safeguarding and security of your client's information.  When hired you become a trusted representative of the company and it is your duty to ensure all materials shared with you remain confidential with a capital "C".

As for my new project, I have felt and heard my "wheels turning" as I play potential scenarios and time lines out in my head.  I am eager to tackle this project and do a good job, and hope this contract may turn into something more.  It also provides me with the opportunity to dust off and sharpen my skills.  Copy writing and design direction - I love taking something a bit outdated and giving it a fresh and shiny new "face".

So new consulting job - blast off!

Now that's a mess! The tale of a cafe, a bottle of syrup and a loose pump

I worked this past Monday morning at the cafe.  In my cleaning frenzy I picked up a bottle of caramel syrup to wash the pump.  Surprise!  The pump was not screwed on.  The bottle fell and hit the floor with a large "clunk".  Amazingly the heavy glass bottle didn't break.

I closed my eyes automatically as caramel scented stickiness flew up in the air and splashed into my face.  I cleaned up the best I could but for the rest of the morning the eyelashes on my left eye stuck together each time I blinked.  My eyebrows were sticky and fine droplets of syrup coated the small amount of hair sticking out of my much-loved (not!) hair net.  About an hour later I glanced down and saw a large syrup cobweb all down the front of my left pantleg.

Once my shift was over I peeled off my hairnet which by now had glued itself to my head and shrugged off my caramel coated smock; and dashed out to my car. 

Having a day like that makes me turn my nose up at caramel!

Has it really been 2 years? Living with the fact you are still out of work.

I was laying on the couch last night and the fact that I've been out of work in my career field for 2 years hit me like a brick.  I felt nauseous.  After years of hard work, dedication and schooling why am I in my current situation?

I love marketing and all it entails.  The excitement of a new product launch or event, the gratification from writing a great piece of copy or a newly designed sales slick, the thrill of supervising a shoot and getting a perfect photograph.  Day to day interaction with colleagues and vendors.  I miss it all.

A lot of colleagues I met at the company I was laid off from are in the same boat at the moment.  Sadly today's job landscape offers more opportunity to those with less experience or fresh out of school.  Less experience = less salary for the company.  I can't count how many times I've been told "you're overqualified for this position" and even "we can't afford you" from a few interviewers.

I do understand the double-edged sword that companies face.  On one hand hiring less experienced employees at a lesser salary is good for the bottom line, but what is being sacrificed when it comes to marketing your brand?  Are you missing out on opportunities simply because your new employees haven't been around long enough or don't know the right people to know where to find these opportunities?  And on the other hand there is the fear that hiring a seasoned employee at a higher salary and spending the time training them may lead to the employee "jumping ship" for more salary or benefits or a better company when the market turns.  But the company can also miss out on some well-crafted marketing plans by taking the less expensive approach.  With today's economy, many in my position with "too much" experience would be willing to take a salary cut to get in with an excellent company and pay their dues to make their way up the rungs of the corporate ladder.

So frustration is my constant companion as of late.  And yet another round of resumes, contacting previous colleagues and vendors for potential leads, and burning the midnight oil on job websites ensues.

I have been told many times by many people that I need to be patient and the job for me is out there.  Short of sky-writing how am I going to find this job opening and court the company to win the job?  I'd even get those tight high heels back on again.

Taking charge while laid off...

For me, being laid off was like a death in the family.  My persona for over 12 years, my career "identity" was gone. 

I began my marketing communications manager job as a marketing assistant and with blood, sweat, tears and a bit of good luck moved up quickly.  I loved the job, the company, and the people. When the job ended I felt a bit lost.

Like with any major loss a support system is vital for going through the grieving process, and without family and friends a major loss seems insurmountable.  Learn to rely on those close to you not only for moral support but also for any potential leads or contacts which may be beneficial.



My daily "job" space

 I have found the best approach is to treat searching for a new job like a job itself.  Set the alarm for a morning time similar to when you were working and shower, dress and have breakfast to start your day.  My "work" days consist of sending out resumes and cover letters, networking via linkedin, and scanning job search sites and local newspapers.

I have also reached out and stayed in touch with previous work contacts and have done some work - writing copy for brochures and websites, creating a marketing plan for a small business - for friends to keep myself from getting rusty.


Hmmm...a new career for me? 
What a nice pilot he was!



Most important, STAY BUSY and make use of your new-found time.  Get a part-time job to supplement your unemployment whether its in your field or not.  Dealing with people on a day to day basis has helped me stay out-going and "on" as I was when attending PR events and giving training sessions while working.  Make a list of all the things around the house you had planned on getting done when you had time.  Make plans to have coffee or lunch with friends you haven't had time to see in a while.  Stay healthy and continue your work-out regimen and make sure to eat!  Sometimes when I get wrapped up on the computer time and meals pass by before you realize it.

Being laid-off isn't the end of the world.  In fact it may lead to an even more fulfilling opportunity, you just need to be patient which isn't easy for me.  So keep your head up and remember this like anything else will pass.